I have so many emotions running thought my head right now. I feel like i have never done this before and im trying to get myself ready for something i have done.
Yes i know it has been 6 long years and 6 years ago i was still a little baby myself. But i think to myself
"Why are you freaking out like this Chelby"
~Im scared that i wont be able to do the labor and that im going to puss out and get the epidural, which is fine and all but i want to be able to go without it as long as i can.
~I'm scared that im going to tear. With Connor my doctor was awesome enough to stay in the room with me to massage down below. I told my new doctor about this and she said she does the same thing. But im still scared that im going to tear cause i feel like little Izaac isn't going to be so little.
~ I'm scared of becoming a momma of TWO. How am i going to be able to take the time with both my boys and make sure they both know how much they mean to me and how important it is to have an amazing bound with each one of them. Will i love one differently then the other one and will they be able to notice it?
~ I'm scared i wont be able to breastfeed like i want to. I never tried to do this with Connor, only because i was still in high school and didn't want to take the time to have to pump at school. Awkward right!!! But this time i have study and study everything about breastfeeding. I know its going to take time and take patients, but what if i cant do this!
~ I'm scared to go back to work after my 6 weeks off. Who is going to watch little Izaac. My dad wont be able to cause well he has one kinda good arm and no legs. He wouldn't be able to change or feed little man. So i have to start thinking of who is going to take care of my baby. I hate feeling like someone else is raising him more then i am. What if they get him on to a routine that doesn't work with me. Or what if they don't feed him the breast milk like i want them to. Or what if Izaac think they are his momma.. It just breaks my heart to think about that.
~ I'm scared my husband and i might drift apart. I know our love will grow much more once we have Izaac, but there is always that "What if".
~ I'm scared i wont be able to keep my house clean and laundry picked up. Yes i know i wont have the cleanest house on the block but i also don't want the dirtiest.
I know im getting myself all worked up over nothing. But i just want whats best for my family and baby. I want to be the mom of the year and the wife of the year. I just want everyone to be happy..
I feel like im becoming a mom for the first time and i have no clue what i am doing anymore.






















