Bad dream!

Yesterdst was a really bad day for me. I was down all day and just not up for anything. After the weekend when my dad kinda went down hill again it just totally changed my mind on everything. I was thinking we were out of the woods and was thinking he was going to be home soon. I was wrong. Anything can change In a short time. And things could go bad to good back to bad in just a few seconds. I know that we will have days like this but I just want things to be perfect again. I want to be able to smile and really mean it. I mean there are time I smile cause I see how well my dad is doing and everything he will do. But there are also days I just can't even smile at all. I hate feeling so help less and like I. An never do anything. But really all my dad needs is us there and he needs to know no matter what happeneds we are behinds him 110%. I'm just tired of being so weak. I know sometimes I need to cry and let everything out, but I feel when I cry I'm not string for my dad. Last night I just broke down. I cried and cried for hours and just let's myself go. I'm scared,worried, pissed off at the world and just lost. I want things back to normal, I want my dad home and I want to not be stressed. I want this bad dream to be over!!!! My dad will be okay and be great, just going to be a long road but totally worth it all in the end!! I love you daddy so so much!